Sunday, 15 July 2007

Tears and tantrums

Can you believe this weather its suppose to be July so where is the sun? Was hoping with the sun would come long walks to help lose the baby weight i gained and also get the girls out in the fresh air but it would appear that its not meant to be. I feel like a caged animal when i cant get out the house for days on end. Ruby doesnt sleep much during the day if we are in the house so ive got both kids to keep entertained, which can be quite difficult when the older one wants to paint or make cakes and the younger one picks this time to want a feed or need a nappy change. This usually results in quite a mess, my ability to multi task is definately put to the test.

Ruby is 10 weeks old now and she is getting much easier especially at night. It can take a couple of attempts to get her settled but once she is asleep i pretty much get the evening to myself then. The problem this week has been with Jessica. On wednesday she had a party at playgroup for all the kids that are leaving and starting school after the summer. We walked in and to say there were kids and adults everywhere is an understatement i found it quite intimidating so i can only imagine how she felt and she got quite upset. I decided to stay with her so as not to upset her any more but while we were in the group singing i had to leave the room as Ruby woke up and was screaming Jessica started to cry and one of the play leaders held onto her and shut the door behind me. She did stop crying but as soon as they left the room to come back to the main hall and Jessica saw me she became quite distressed again. She eventually calmed down and seemed to enjoy the rest of the party. However that night when we tried to put her to bed she threw an almighty tantrum when we tried to close the bedroom door, a couple of hours later she calmed down enough to fall asleep, but since then whenever we shut a door or stairgate and she cant get to us she becomes really distressed. Her behaviour has also changed when we take her out, we get a lot more tears and tantrums that we did before. We are finding it difficult because she disturbs Ruby and we have never really had a problem with her at night she has pretty much always been a good sleeper and we have never needed to leave a light on or have the door open. Each night she is slowly getting better but at the moment the door is having to be left open although the size of gap it is left open is gradually getting smaller and im hoping in a few night we can have it shut altogether. I dont know if this is a normal phase kids go through, separation anxiety i think they call it or if its a real problem. I just hope she gets back to normal soon. But i think it just shows how one seemingly small incident can have a big impact on a child and their behaviour. It has really made me think.

5 comments:

emma said...

Poor jess, poor you for that matter. I remember doing a short course on attachement theory with a child psychologist and she was brilliantly reassuring about children who cry when they are left - she said it was hhow it should be. If they didn't that would be more of a worry. As for fear of the dark or closed doors, I still have to have the door slightly ajar at night and I daren't tell you how old I am!
The love and care that you have for your children really shines through pebbles-ricycle - they are a pair of very lucky little girls.
Emma.

Garfield said...

Hiya!

How r u?
I believe its bit hard thing about kids feeling sometimes.
But I know u will be fine with ur little girls deffo!
Big thank u 4 lots of baby stuff by the way! It was really helpful 4 us and baby!!! My husband says thank u 4 that too!
Hope u'll have a gr8 day and the sunshine will be smiling at u guys!

Garfield x

bilingual said...

thanx so so much 4 your gifts,my wife is thanking you too,and i wish to thank u as well.
my wife is a better writer than me.
anyway thank you xxx

klahanie said...

Hi pebbles-ricicle-
Where is the sun indeed! Or is the British 'Summer' the warm part of Winter? I hope the sun starts to shine on all of us very soon.
Ah,the trials and tribulations of parenthood. It sounds like your your daughter Jessica is adjusting to having a little sister. When a parent has to spread their attention to another child. The result is that the other child may become confused. I'm pretty sure this will be a short, passing phase with Jessica.
You are obviously a decent,caring Mother. I wish you well as the bonding process continues.
Warm regards adanac67.

Garfield said...

Hello again!

thank u 4 ur comments!
And I need ur help! What should I take to hospital when my labor start? can u plz tell me a list if u don't mind?
Thank u!

Garfield x